waiting
I spent most of my life being indecisive and stayed on the hamster wheel of insecurity for years. I was scared I would regret my choices. I was worried what my family and friends would think. I feared making a choice would bring unhappiness. I believed money or love would never arrive. I feared life would never change for the better. So I chose to just go through the motions. It was a daily battle to stay out of a scarcity mindset and try to be grateful for the little things. I finally hit a breaking point and wondered what the hell happened? Where did time go? How did everyone else’s life change but mine has remained exactly the same for decades now? I’m still young but not a child. I can’t let the next 40 years breeze by and be the person on their death bed that says I wish I would’ve done it different.
What was I waiting for? It was time to get off the hamster wheel and make choices. What is your breaking point? At what point do you decide that you no longer want to continue on the path you are on? Are you happy? Are you doing work that you love? Are your relationships mutually satisfying?
I hit a breaking point where I dreaded waking up, going to work, then sitting home alone every night. Mornings sucked, the people I worked with were miserable, and it was depressing to not sharing my evenings with someone I loved. How did I get here? Even after making some living and career changes, why is the outcome the same? What do I need to do to change the trajectory of my life? What needs to happen differently? After some major self-reflection and seeking out help through classes and coaching, I discovered I am the common denominator in all the outcomes. I am the one that needs to change.
Interesting and oh so obvious when you take a step back and look at everything. I made all the choices. I let life go on in this monotonous unhappy rhythm. I was the one solely responsible for my life and I was the only one who could change it. What was I waiting for?
Quit waiting. You don’t have to stay stuck in your life.
